Updated: 11 November, 2023
Sex is great, but it can be even better! Sex and intimacy in a relationship are ongoing processes that have many forms and many ways to approach them. It has its ups and downs, and there is nothing wrong with saying, I want to spice things up!
Sometimes, all it takes to boost your sex life is a change in attitude. The right mindset can turn any routine into a pleasure-filled experience.
So, if you think there are some things you could improve in the bedroom—excellent—you have come to the right place. For all the people who have trouble finding new ways to spice up their love lives, we've compiled the following list of five ideas that are guaranteed to have your partner begging for more!
In this article, we will cover a brief overview of how to become more creative under the sheets and have the best sex ever! To learn more about sex and foreplay, you can find more in-depth articles related to improving sexual wellness here.
*Tips are sorted in no particular order and can be done separately.
Read time: approximately 9 minutes.
7 Simple Ways to Become More Creative in Your Sex Life
Why Should You Be More Creative in Bed?
When you're having sex, do you ever get bored? Do you ever get sick of the same old tricks and positions that seem to always work? Or do you feel like you've tried them all and that there are no new kinky sex positions left for you to discover? If so, you probably hit a mental wall by thinking there is nothing new to try. Or you may want to try something new but are afraid your partner will not like it.
Something needs to be added, but I need to know where and how to start. That is where creativity comes to the rescue. By being more creative, we also allow ourselves to be open to new ideas, activities, poses, and experiences, which are exciting.
So, are you ready to change up your sex routine and experience new things?
Here are 7 quick tips on how to increase your creativity in your sexual life.
1. Understand Your Sexual Desire
When we think about how to be creative in bed and in our love lives, there's one word we hear repeatedly: desire. And for good reason. If we want to be more sexually inventive, we need to understand and cultivate it. The best way to understand sexual desire is to know how it works. Desire is the urge to do something or be something. It is the need or lack of need for sex.
For example, if you have an itch on your arm, you may not be able to scratch it because it would hurt too much. However, to feel better, you must do what is necessary to eliminate that itch. Desire is the same. We all have an urge to have sex with a specific person. When you have this desire, you can't stop yourself from wanting to do it.
Of course, there is no magic pill you can take or switch you can flip to turn on your desire, but indeed, there are things you enjoy more than others. If you have a kink, even better.
Maybe you can't resist high heels. It may be as simple as watching your partner clean the dishes. It may be a fun date night. Maybe it is a sexy lap dance or a sexy massage. Every person is different, but there is something for everyone.
So, find the things that turn you on, then be truthful to yourself, then talk about them with your partner, and see how your desires can be triggered. And then, well, good, sexy things will follow.
2. Discover the Power of Sexual Fantasy
We are sure you've heard of the phrase "fantasy is the spice of life." However, if you think about how it applies to sex, the saying could be reversed. Fantasy is what gives the spice of life to sex. It's the element that makes sexual fantasies so enjoyable and fun—and the element that often gets overlooked in the bedroom.
When you understand that it's the fantasy of having sex with someone who can have sex with that person so hot and exciting, you begin to see why it's so important to explore them more.
We have created two excellent tools to help you discover and unleash your fantasies: Naughty Scenarios and Naughty Conversations.
The Naughty Scenarios is a card game that lets you experience role-playing and enjoy thousands of different scenarios where you allow yourself to be someone else and experience the pleasure. Role-playing can be such a fantastic way to boost your sexual creativity!
The Naughty Conversations are a set of questions for you and your partner to better know your desires and fantasies and uncover more about your sexuality.
3. Turn Your Lovemaking into a Tantric Experience
What is tantric sex? As Medical News Today puts it, "Tantric sex is a slow, meditative form of sex where the end goal is not orgasm but enjoying the sexual journey and sensations of the body."
The first rule of tantra is not to think about sex. Sex becomes a natural and instinctive part of the day when we're in love, and having sex is much easier when it feels like it's a pleasurable expression of love. But it can also be a source of anxiety and guilt if it isn't working out. It's common for people to feel embarrassed by their desire for sexual pleasure or guilty about taking sexual pleasure.
When we talk about Tantric sex, we mean that you should make sure that your whole body is involved in the experience. It will allow us to thoroughly explore each other's bodies.
Suppose you're talking about the Tantric philosophy. In that case, you'll want to focus on the energy within yourself and between you and your partner. You'll want to ensure that your thoughts are clear, that your mind is focused, and that you're ready to give your all.
So, the bottom line is that if you wish to improve your sexual connection, start with your mind, and then the body will follow. Become more intimate emotionally with your partner, and then the physical pleasure will follow in many forms.
4. Use Tools to Guide Your Creativity
A simple way to spice things up and become more creative in bed is to use pleasure play and sex toys. By using these tools, you can get the most out of your bedroom. On top of that, you'll find that you can use sexual foreplay to reach orgasm a lot faster than you're used to. The toys themselves can be an inspiration in your creative process.
What we mean by that is that by experimenting and trying out a new toy, you may discover a unique pleasure point or a new approach you would like to explore more. If you don't have any of these items and don't know where to start, you are not alone, because today, the sheer number of choices when it comes to sex toys is overwhelming.
From the usual lubes, dildos, cock-rings, and whips, you can find yourself looking at leather costumes, clamps, electric-shock vibrators, anal play, and much, much more.
So, we would recommend first reflecting on what you already like and then choosing the sex toy that might reinforce it. Maybe you like hand-pay, then go ahead and take a pocket pussy for him and a vibrator for her and introduce this to your foreplay.
Another great gateway toy is the Satin Pleasure Ties. They are innocent enough to be used as simply blindfolding your partner, but at the same time, they are versatile, so they can be introduced as an accessory in sexual play to heighten other senses and can be used among the most sophisticated couples.
5. Incorporate Oral Sex
Although it is becoming more and more common, oral sex is still taboo among many couples, but it should not be like that.
Oral sex is a wonderful way of not only spicing things up, but it can also be a form of foreplay, a form of teasing before the main event, and a form of receiving (and giving) mind-blowing orgasms.
So, use this "tool" as an excellent addition to your sexual life, and get creative!
6. Make a Sex Bucket-List
In addition to talking about fantasies, you can write them down and make them into one extensive, sexy bucket list of things you wish to do at least once in your lifetime.
You may need help to do everything on that list. Still, just making the list will open your mind to imagination and creativity.
To make this task even hotter and more exciting, you can write some things together and some just by yourselves and present them to each other as a surprise.
7. Know How to Keep Your Relationship Healthy
This does not reflect directly on sex and is a broad tip. Still, honestly, when you have a harmonic, loving, and trustful relationship, the sex will also be much better.
So, one of the most important things you can do to keep your relationship healthy is to be there for each other. To care for and love each other, and just to be for them. Being there for one another means that you show up when your partner needs you to be there, whether emotionally or physically.
You should also be willing to go through the same struggles as your partner, as long as it's in a loving and safe environment.
And, if you are sweet and loving outside the bedroom, it does not mean you can't be rough in it. Quite the opposite: if you genuinely love and trust each other, then you will be able to play out many activities, from sweet and vanilla to kinky—whatever is right for you!
There is no ONE right way to have sex. Sex is many things, and it can take many forms, so at least a little creativity in your sexual routine is a must.
This isn't to say that you need to do anything specific to your own sexual preferences—you don't. You must learn what turns you on and how to incorporate that into your bedroom activities. To unlock your sexual creativity, first, you need to be true to yourself and open up about your desires and fantasies. Then, you and your partner should be faithful to each other.
You also need to know your limits and how much you can comfortably ask of a partner. Suppose you are free and authentic in your relationship. In that case, your bodies are the canvas; use them to paint many exciting, breathtaking, and unique moments together and have the best sex ever!
We would love to hear from you!
Do you consider yourself to be creative in sex? What are your innovative ways to turn on your partner?
Maybe we missed something important that would improve your ability to become more creative in sex?
Leave your thoughts in the comment section below!