7 Simple Ways to Become More Creative in Your Sex Life

Updated: April 10th, 2024

Sex is great, but it can be even better! Sex and intimacy in a relationship are ongoing processes that have many forms and many ways to approach them. It has its ups and downs, and there is nothing wrong with saying, I want to spice things up!

Sometimes, all it takes to boost your sex life is a change in attitude. The right mindset can turn any routine into a pleasure-filled experience.

So, if you think there are some things you could improve in the bedroom—excellent—you have come to the right place. For all the people who have trouble finding new ways to spice up their love lives, we've compiled the following list of five ideas that are guaranteed to have your partner begging for more!

In this article, we will cover a brief overview of how to become more creative under the sheets and have the best sex ever! To learn more about sex and foreplay, you can find more in-depth articles related to improving sexual wellness here.

*Tips are sorted in no particular order and can be done separately. 

 

Read time: approximately 9 minutes.

7 Simple Ways to Become More Creative in Your Sex Life

 

Why Should You Be More Creative in Bed?

When you're having sex, do you ever get bored? Do you ever get sick of the same old tricks and positions that seem to always work? Or do you feel like you've tried them all and that there are no new kinky sex positions left for you to discover? If so, you probably hit a mental wall by thinking there is nothing new to try. Or you may want to try something new but are afraid your partner will not like it.

Something needs to be added, but I need to know where and how to start. That is where creativity comes to the rescue. By being more creative, we also allow ourselves to be open to new ideas, activities, poses, and experiences, which are exciting.

So, are you ready to change up your sex routine and experience new things?

Don't be shy about saying yes. "People are more likely to enjoy sexual experiences that feel new and exciting, rather than stale and boring."

Here are 7 quick tips on how to increase your creativity in your sexual life.

Become better at sex

1. Understand Your Sexual Desire

When we think about how to be creative in bed and in our love lives, there's one word we hear repeatedly: desireAnd for good reason. If we want to be more sexually inventive, we need to understand and cultivate it. The best way to understand sexual desire is to know how it works. Desire is the urge to do something or be something. It is the need or lack of need for sex.

For example, if you have an itch on your arm, you may not be able to scratch it because it would hurt too much. However, to feel better, you must do what is necessary to eliminate that itch. Desire is the same. We all have an urge to have sex with a specific person. When you have this desire, you can't stop yourself from wanting to do it.

Of course, there is no magic pill you can take or switch you can flip to turn on your desire, but indeed, there are things you enjoy more than others. If you have a fetish or kink, even better.

Maybe you can't resist high heels. It may be as simple as watching your partner clean the dishes. It may be a fun date night. Maybe it is a sexy lap dance or a sexy massage. Every person is different, but there is something for everyone.

So, find the things that turn you on, then be truthful to yourself, then talk about them with your partner, and see how your desires can be triggered. And then, well, good, sexy things will follow.

2. Discover the Power of Sexual Fantasy

We are sure you've heard of the phrase "fantasy is the spice of life." However, if you think about how it applies to sex, the saying could be reversed. Fantasy is what gives the spice of life to sex. It's the element that makes sexual fantasies so enjoyable and fun—and the element that often gets overlooked in the bedroom.

When you understand that it's the fantasy of having sex with someone who can have sex with that person so hot and exciting, you begin to see why it's so important to explore them more.

We have created two excellent tools to help you discover and unleash your fantasies: Naughty Scenarios and Naughty Conversations.

The Naughty Scenarios is a card game that lets you experience role-playing and enjoy thousands of different scenarios where you allow yourself to be someone else and experience the pleasure. Role-playing can be such a fantastic way to boost your sexual creativity!

The Naughty Conversations are a set of questions for you and your partner to better know your desires and fantasies and uncover more about your sexuality.


 

Better sex for couples

 

3. Turn Your Lovemaking into a Tantric Experience

What is tantric sex? As Medical News Today puts it, "Tantric sex is a slow, meditative form of sex where the end goal is not orgasm but enjoying the sexual journey and sensations of the body."[1]

The first rule of tantra is not to think about sex. Sex becomes a natural and instinctive part of the day when we're in love, and having sex is much easier when it feels like it's a pleasurable expression of love. But it can also be a source of anxiety and guilt if it isn't working out. It's common for people to feel embarrassed by their desire for sexual pleasure or guilty about taking sexual pleasure.

When we talk about Tantric sex, we mean that you should make sure that your whole body is involved in the experience. It will allow us to thoroughly explore each other's bodies.

Suppose you're talking about the Tantric philosophy. In that case, you'll want to focus on the energy within yourself and between you and your partner. You'll want to ensure that your thoughts are clear, that your mind is focused, and that you're ready to give your all.

So, the bottom line is that if you wish to improve your sexual connection, start with your mind, and then the body will follow. Become more intimate emotionally with your partner, and then the physical pleasure will follow in many forms.


 

man and woman wearing underwear intimately lying in bed and looking at each other

4. Use Tools to Guide Your Creativity

A simple way to spice things up and become more creative in bed is to use pleasure play and sex toysBy using these tools, you can get the most out of your bedroom. On top of that, you'll find that you can use sexual foreplay to reach orgasm a lot faster than you're used to. The toys themselves can be an inspiration in your creative process.

What we mean by that is that by experimenting and trying out a new toy, you may discover a unique pleasure point or a new approach you would like to explore more. If you don't have any of these items and don't know where to start, you are not alone, because today, the sheer number of choices when it comes to sex toys is overwhelming.

From the usual lubes, dildos, cock-rings, and whips, you can find yourself looking at leather costumes, clamps, electric-shock vibrators, anal play, and much, much more.

So, we would recommend first reflecting on what you already like and then choosing the sex toy that might reinforce it. Maybe you like hand-pay, then go ahead and take a pocket pussy for him and a vibrator for her and introduce this to your foreplay.

Another great gateway toy is the Satin Pleasure Ties. They are innocent enough to be used as simply blindfolding your partner, but at the same time, they are versatile, so they can be introduced as an accessory in sexual play to heighten other senses and can be used among the most sophisticated couples.


 

Relationship conversation game

5. Incorporate Oral Sex

Although it is becoming more and more common, oral sex is still taboo among many couples, but it should not be like that.

Oral sex is a wonderful way of not only spicing things up, but it can also be a form of foreplay, a form of teasing before the main event, and a form of receiving (and giving) mind-blowing orgasms.

So, use this "tool" as an excellent addition to your sexual life, and get creative!

6. Make a Sex Bucket-List

In addition to talking about fantasies, you can write them down and make them into one extensive, sexy bucket list of things you wish to do at least once in your lifetime.

You may need help to do everything on that list. Still, just making the list will open your mind to imagination and creativity.

To make this task even hotter and more exciting, you can write some things together and some just by yourselves and present them to each other as a surprise.

 

man and woman laying under the sheets and playfully looking at each other

7. Know How to Keep Your Relationship Healthy

This does not reflect directly on sex and is a broad tip. Still, honestly, when you have a harmonic, loving, and trustful relationship, the sex will also be much better.

So, one of the most important things you can do to keep your relationship healthy is to be there for each other. To care for and love each other, and just to be for them. Being there for one another means that you show up when your partner needs you to be there, whether emotionally or physically.

You should also be willing to go through the same struggles as your partner, as long as it's in a loving and safe environment.

And, if you are sweet and loving outside the bedroom, it does not mean you can't be rough in it. Quite the opposite: if you genuinely love and trust each other, then you will be able to play out many activities, from sweet and vanilla to kinky—whatever is right for you!

 

Bonus: Further Your Sexual Creativity With Quick Tips

Kinky Sex Ideas

Dive into the exhilarating world of kink with a spirit of curiosity and open communication, embracing the thrilling dynamics of power play and light bondage as a pathway to profound intimacy and pleasure. Start by introducing Joyful Couple's Kinky Game and Sensual Pleasure Ties, creating a safe space to explore the delicate balance between control and surrender, enhancing trust and connection.

Experiment with blindfolds to heighten senses and anticipation, turning every touch into a guessing game of pleasure. Incorporate safe words to maintain boundaries, ensuring that every exploration is grounded in consent and mutual respect. This journey into kink is not just about the physical sensations but about deepening your bond by exploring new territories together, discovering hidden desires, and celebrating the diversity of your sexual expression in a safe, playful, and loving environment.

Ideas to Spice Up Your Sex Life

Infuse your sex life with a dash of unpredictability and excitement by incorporating playful challenges and spontaneous adventures. Introduce the Naughty Game to your intimate moments, where each card promises to uncover hidden desires and embark on explorations that push the boundaries of your comfort zones in a fun and consensual way.

Beyond games, create a "pleasure jar" where both partners can deposit ideas for new activities, fantasies to fulfill, or even new locations within the home to make love, drawing a surprise suggestion to act upon whenever you're feeling adventurous. Embrace the art of seduction with unexpected gestures of desire, like leaving suggestive notes for each other or sending flirty messages leading up to your time alone.

These ideas are designed not just to spice up your sex life but to weave a tapestry of anticipation, excitement, and discovery, keeping the flame of passion alive and burning brightly in your relationship.

Ideas to Try in the Bedroom

Revitalize your bedroom dynamics by introducing surprise and exploration elements that ignite passion and intimacy. Consider role-playing scenarios that allow you to step into different personas, offering a playful escape into fantasy while exploring new facets of your desires. Venture into the discovery of untapped erogenous zones with a game of sensory exploration, using various textures and temperatures to map out new paths to pleasure on each other's bodies.

Challenge your physical and emotional connection by experimenting with positions that are out of your usual repertoire, encouraging a sense of adventure and teamwork. The essence lies in the shared experience, the laughter, and the unexpected moments of joy that arise from trying something new together, transforming the bedroom into a sanctuary of exploration and deepened connection.

Ideas for Sex Positions

Introduce a new angle to your intimacy with positions that invite deeper connection, exploring the physical and emotional dimensions of your love in ways you haven't before. Consider positions that allow for eye contact and easy conversation, like the face-to-face coziness of the Lotus, where you sit entwined, looking into each other's eyes, sharing breaths, and syncing your movements. Explore the closeness of spooning, a position that envelops you in warmth and security, perfect for slow, intimate moments.

For those seeking a playful yet connected experience, try the sitting positions that allow for laughter and ease, where the focus shifts from performance to the joy of being together. These positions are not just about achieving physical pleasure but about enhancing the emotional bond, making each encounter a discovery of new depths in your relationship.

Non-Penetrative Sex Ideas

Discover the art of anticipation and tease with the Foreplay Game. This game celebrates the depth and richness of non-penetrative intimacy, where touch, sight, and sound become the languages of desire. Engage in an extended foreplay session that focuses on the senses—blindfold each other to heighten touch and sound, use feathers or ice for temperature play, and communicate desires through whispers and gentle guidance.

Experiment with body massages using scented oils to awaken the skin and deepen the connection without immediate gratification. The goal is to build intimacy and pleasure through exploration and creativity, making every touch, every breath, and every moment an integral part of your shared sexual journey, turning the act itself into a deep bonding experience that celebrates the full spectrum of intimacy beyond the physical.


 

Couple goals - improve sex

In Conclusion

It is a myth that sex comes easy, simply because you love each other. There is no ONE right way to have sex. Sex is many things, and it can take many forms, so at least a little creativity in your sexual routine is a must.

This isn't to say that you need to do anything specific to your own sexual preferences—you don't. You must learn what turns you on and how to incorporate that into your bedroom activities. To unlock your sexual creativity, first, you need to be true to yourself and open up about your desires and fantasies. Then, you and your partner should be faithful to each other.

You also need to know your limits and how much you can comfortably ask of a partner. Suppose you are free and authentic in your relationship. In that case, your bodies are the canvas; use them to paint many exciting, breathtaking, and unique moments together and have the best sex ever!

As always, read other relationship tips and look around our store for thoughtful and sexy gifts for couples.


 

Improve my sex life

We would love to hear from you!

Do you consider yourself to be creative in sex? What are your innovative ways to turn on your partner?

Maybe we missed something important that would improve your ability to become more creative in sex?

Leave your thoughts in the comment section below!

 

FAQ Section

1. How can we start exploring our sexual fantasies together?

To explore your sexual fantasies together, communication is vital. Start by having an open and honest conversation about your desires and fantasies. You can use tools like the Naughty Scenarios, or Naughty Conversations mentioned in the article to facilitate discussions and uncover more about each other's sexuality. Sharing and respecting each other's fantasies can significantly enhance your sexual creativity and intimacy.

2. What are some beginner-friendly ways to incorporate tantra into our sex life?

Beginner-friendly ways to incorporate tantra into your sex life include focusing on slow, meditative sexual experiences where the goal is the journey rather than the destination. Start by creating a relaxed and intimate atmosphere, then engage in prolonged foreplay, eye contact, and synchronized breathing. The key is to be fully present with each other, enhancing emotional connection and physical sensation.

3. How can we introduce sex toys into our relationship without feeling awkward?

Introducing couple's sex toys into your relationship begins with an open discussion about your interest in exploring them together. Start by researching options that cater to your curiosities and comfort levels. You might choose a night to browse online stores or visit a shop together, making it a fun and shared experience. Begin with simple and non-intimidating toys, such as vibrators or satin pleasure ties, and communicate openly about your experiences and preferences as you explore.

4. Can a sex bucket list really improve our sexual relationship?

Yes, creating a sex bucket list can significantly improve your sexual relationship. It encourages open communication about your desires, fantasies, and things you both want to try. This process can enhance your relationship's anticipation, excitement, and sense of adventure. Write down your fantasies separately and together, then share and discuss how you can make them a reality, ensuring you respect each other's boundaries and consent.

 

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