Relationship Tips · Jan 20, 2023

Increase Intimacy Through Physical Touch Outside of Sex

Updated: February 20th, 2025

Imagine a relationship where every touch feels like a promise, where the smallest gestures create the deepest bonds. Emotional physical intimacy isn't just about what happens in the bedroom—it's the foundation that holds a loving relationship together. The comforting embrace, the reassuring touch, the silent connection speaks louder than words.

In this article, we delve into the transformative power of physical affection beyond sex. Discover how to elevate your relationship through non-sexual touch, tackle common obstacles, and find practical solutions to enhance your bond.

Why focus on physical affection without the sexual element? Because these intimate gestures lay the groundwork for a more profound, satisfying connection, often leading to a sexual attraction. Let's uncover the secrets to a truly intimate relationship that thrives on touch and closeness.

Read time: approximately 5 minutes.

How to Increase Intimacy Through Physical Touch and Affection Outside of Sexual Activity

The Importance of Physical Touch and Affection

Physical touch and affection are vital components of any healthy relationship. They are a way to show care and support and have numerous physiological benefits.

Emotional and Physical Benefits

In a nutshell, physical touch and affection help us demonstrate our love and presence to our partners. Beyond fostering passionate emotional link, studies have shown that these acts have significant physiological benefits.

Reducing Stress: Physical touch helps reduce stress levels by releasing oxytocin, the "love hormone," which promotes calmness and relaxation. This process can lower blood pressure and decrease cortisol levels, the stress hormone.
Increasing Happiness: When we hug or touch someone we love, our bodies release endorphins, which act as natural painkillers and mood elevators. This release improves overall well-being and happiness within the relationship.
Enhancing Intimacy: Simple physical acts like hugging or holding hands can convey "I am here for you" and "I care for you" without words. These gestures foster a deeper emotional connection and strengthen the bond between partners.

Non-Sexual Physical Affection

It's important to remember that physical touch and affection extend beyond sexual activity. Simple gestures such as holding hands, hugging, a pat on the back, a kiss on the forehead, cuddling, or even a friendly hand on the shoulder can convey love and closeness. These small acts can make a significant impact on your relationship.

So, make it a point to touch your partner whenever you can. Now, let's explore some simple techniques to improve your physical intimacy.

a couple being affectionate; the man hugging his woman from behind; woman enjoying it with eyes closed

Ways to Increase Physical Intimacy and Affection

Now that we understand the importance of physical touch and affection in relationships let's explore ways to increase it in your relationships with your partner.

1. Set Aside Dedicated Time for Love and Affection

This might sound so obvious that you might dismiss it. Still, the truth is that neglecting to set aside dedicated time for each other is one of the main reasons couples drift apart. In our fast-paced world, where we're constantly juggling countless responsibilities, it's too easy to overlook our relationship needs. However, making time for physical touch and connection is crucial.

Dr. Sue Johnson, a clinical psychologist and relationship expert, emphasizes, "Emotionally responsive partners who prioritize connection time significantly improve their relationship satisfaction."1

Incorporate moments of physical touch love language into your daily routine. Whether it's a warm hug in the morning, a tender cuddle session before bed, a planned date evenings, or even a spontaneous staycation, these moments are essential.

Prioritize each other by synchronizing your calendars and creating specific times meant just for the two of you. These small yet intentional acts can significantly strengthen your bond and keep your relationship thriving.

a couple cuddling in bed; the woman is on top; both are smiling

2. Incorporate Physical Touch and Affection Into Your Daily Routine

Often, couples can become so accustomed to one another that they forget the power of touch. Incorporating physical affection into your daily routine can significantly enhance your emotional connection.

Dr. Kory Floyd, a professor of communication, highlights, "Regular physical touch is crucial for relationship satisfaction and can decrease stress levels and increase feelings of security and happiness."2

Though it might sound too simple, the smallest gestures often make the most significant difference. So, make a conscious effort to touch and be touched daily. Whether through a hug, a kiss, or a reassuring hand on the leg, these moments of physical connection can profoundly impact your relationship.

3. Show Affection Through Non-verbal Cues

Physical affection goes beyond touch, as non-verbal cues can deeply enhance intimacy and emotional connection. A smile can light up your partner’s day, a loving look can convey deep affection, and a gentle wink can create a private moment just for you. These non-verbal gestures are powerful ways to show your partner you care, even without physical contact.

Dr. Albert Mehrabian, an expert in nonverbal communication, explains that 93% of communication is nonverbal, which includes body language, facial expressions, and tone of voice. These subtle actions can communicate love and support more powerfully than words.3

When you make eye contact, smile warmly, or send a playful wink, you tell your partner they are cherished and noticed. These small, consistent gestures build a reservoir of positive feelings and build a stronger relationship. So, next time you see your partner, remember that a loving look or a simple smile can go a long way in maintaining the emotional fabric of your relationship.

a couple being affectionate; the man and woman looking at each other and smiling

4. Try Something New

Routine can dull the spark in any relationship, causing physical affection and intimacy to wane. Stepping out of your comfort zone and trying something new together can reignite that connection.

One effective way to break free from the mundane is through couples massages. This intimate activity allows you to relax and enjoy each other's touch in a soothing environment. Enhancing this experience with our specially crafted massage oils can make it even more special. Our luxury massage oils are designed to nourish the skin and fill the room with enchanting scents, creating a perfect atmosphere for relaxation and romance.

Imagine a quiet evening dedicated to each other, with soft music playing, the room filled with the soothing aroma of our massage oils, and your touch communicating love and tenderness. This isn't just about physical relaxation; it's about reconnecting emotionally and rediscovering the joy of being close.

So, next time you feel your relationship needs a little spark, try a couples massage with our luxurious oils. It's a simple yet profoundly effective way to deepen your connection.

5. Show Affection When You are Upset or Angry

It's natural to withdraw from physical touch during anger, sadness, or frustration. However, this withdrawal can create emotional distance and weaken your bond over time. Embracing each other during these challenging moments is crucial for maintaining a strong connection.

Imagine you're in the midst of an argument, emotions running high. In that moment, a gentle touch or a warm hug can act as a powerful reminder of your love and commitment. It's not about ignoring the issue but about reinforcing that, despite the conflict, your bond remains strong. Physical affection in these times can reduce stress and foster a sense of safety and understanding.

It may feel awkward initially, but consistently reaching out to each other, even when you're upset, builds resilience in your relationship. It shows that your connection is more important than any disagreement. Choosing to be vulnerable and affectionate during tough times paves the way for deeper emotional intimacy and mutual appreciation.

So next time you find yourselves in a heated moment, try to bridge the gap with a touch, a hug, or a gentle gesture. It's a small act that speaks volumes, reminding you that love and connection triumph over conflict.

a couple being playful and happy under the sheets; both are smiling

6. Play an Exciting Relationship Game

Are you ready to turn up the heat and deepen your connection? Our expertly crafted couple quiz is designed to ignite your relationship and make every moment together an adventure in intimacy.

Explore a collection of sensual games that address your deepest questions about love. These aren't just games—they were developed specifically for couples like you, aiming to enhance physical affection and create unforgettable experiences.

Whether you want to improve communication, delve into emotional depths, or add a spicy twist to your physical intimacy, our games cover it all.

Why Our Relationship Games Are Special:

Tailored for Passion: Each game is designed to bring you closer, sparking playful teasing and steamy nights of passion.
Diverse Goals: Choose from games focusing on emotional bonding, communication, or purely physical pleasure.
Expertly Developed: Crafted with insights from relationship experts, these games ensure you and your partner connect on every level.

If this sounds like something you would like to try out, go ahead and see our:

All Relationship Games

7. Overcome Obstacles Hindering Your Physical Intimacy

While physical touch and affection are essential for maintaining intimacy in a relationship, obstacles can make it difficult to increase them. Here are some common obstacles and solutions for overcoming them.

Lack of time: One of the most common obstacles to healthy physical affection is a lack of time. With busy schedules, setting aside dedicated time for physical touch and affection can be challenging. Solution: Set aside dedicated time each day, whether for a morning hug, a cuddle session before bed, or a weekly date night to focus on physical touch and affection.

Feeling self-conscious: Some people may feel self-conscious about showing physical touch and affection. Solution: Start small and gradually increase physical touch and affection. Take baby steps and find a comfortable level that works for both partners.

Past traumas or experiences: Past life trauma or negative experience can make it difficult for some people to engage in physical touch and affection. Solution: Talk about past traumas or negative experiences with a therapist or counselor to work through them. It's also important to have open and honest communication with your partner about boundaries and comfort levels.

Physical limitations: Physical limitations can make engaging in physical touch and affection difficult for some people. Solution: Get creative and find comfortable ways to show both partners physical touch and affection.

Lack of communication: Lack of communication can make understanding each other's needs and desires for physical touch and affection difficult. Solution: Communicate openly and honestly with your partner about your needs and desires for physical touch and affection.

a couple fully clothed are laying in bed; the man is hugging her from behind

Conclusion

For couples struggling to maintain physical intimacy, it's crucial to remember the transformative power of touch. Physical affection isn't just about sexual activity; it's about creating a deep, emotional bond that transcends everyday challenges. The gentle embrace, loving touch, and unspoken connection all reinforce your love and maintain the physical intimacy in your relationship.

You can reignite the spark in your relationship by dedicating time to each other, integrating physical touch into your daily lives, using nonverbal cues, trying new activities, and showing affection even when times are tough. These consistent, heartfelt gestures foster the most profound connections.

For those facing difficulties, prioritizing physical touch and affection can be the key to revitalizing your relationship. By embracing the small moments of love and connection, you can watch your bond grow stronger and more intimate, overcoming the challenges you may be facing.

Ready to transform your relationship? Explore our range of Relationship Games designed to bring passion and deeper connection. Subscribe to our newsletter for expert advice and tools to enrich your love life. Start today and turn your relationship struggles into a journey of rediscovery and profound intimacy.

FAQ Section:

Why is physical touch important in a relationship? Physical touch releases oxytocin, reduces stress, increases happiness, and strengthens emotional bonds, making it crucial for relationship health.
How can I incorporate more physical affection into my daily routine? Simple gestures like holding hands, hugging, and kissing can easily enhance closeness.
What are some creative ways to increase physical intimacy? Trying new activities like dance classes, couples massages, or relationship games can rejuvenate your connection and increase physical affection.
How can we overcome obstacles to physical intimacy? Address time constraints by scheduling dedicated time, communicate openly about comfort levels, and seek professional help for past traumas or self-consciousness.
Can physical touch help during difficult times in a relationship? Yes, showing affection during tough times can decrease stress and foster closeness, strengthening the relationship in the long run.

Citations:

1. Unveiling the Attachment Science view of Emotional and Sexual Intimacy: A Conversation with Dr. Sue Johnson on The Knowledge Project, https://csheehanjr.com/the-knowledge-project/

2. Dr. Kory Floyd, Study: Expressing love can improve your health, https://news.asu.edu/content/study-expressing-love-can-improve-your-health

3. How Much of Communication Is Nonverbal? https://online.utpb.edu/about-us/articles/communication/how-much-of-communication-is-nonverbal/