When couples argue constructively, it can lead to a stronger relationship. On the other hand, when disagreements turn into fights, it can cause serious damage to the relationship. So, how do you know if your arguing is constructive or destructive? Read on to find out.
Also, if you wish to know how to reconnect after a fight, you might want to read this article as well.
Read time: approximately 15 minutes.
Arguments in a Relationship: Can they can be good, and the most common mistakes
Why arguing might be good for you?
Fights happen. They are an inevitable part of relationships, so it is best to prepare it and learn how to do it as less damaging, and as constructive as possible. You will also find some reasons why you may want and need conflict for things to work out well with the person you’re dating or married to!
And, when not so much?
We can argue about what is right and wrong, what to do or what not to do, but as long as you're doing it in the wrong way then it's not going to matter. When we fight without a solid reasoning that we end up in a cycle of arguing.
We have all seen couples where one person says something so blatantly unfair and untrue that the other person doesn't know what to do anymore so they fight instead, and then the first person fights more, and so on.
This is the wrong way to handle things because arguing for the sake of arguing never solves anything.
Which kind of couples fight?
What to avoid, when arguing?
1. Using "You" and “I” statements.
2. Trying to desperately prove your point
3. Arguing only for the sake of arguing
4. Not trying to turn things around
5. Keep fueling the flames
6. Not giving up by any means
7. Sabotaging the conversation
8. Trying to win by any means
9. Repeating yourself over and over
10. Carrying an argument or returning to it while angry
11. Not listening
How to know when arguments are ruining your relationship
How to handle arguments effectively